After the tone...

Harley's Rules for phone messages...

1.) Keep it simple. Just the essential information please.

2.) Leave your number twice, once at the beginning of you message, and again at the end.

3.) Speak more slowly than usual. Especially if this is your first contact with the person you are calling. Otherwise, your listener might wonder why you want to talk about your felicias when you are calling from a company that handles internet stuff.

example: "HimynameisJaneSmithI'mcallingfrominternalcompanywehandleVOIPandpandasandallsortsofotherthingsthatI willtellyouaboutrightnowandIwasreferredbyinmiricompanypleasecallmeat8005551289sowecandiscussourfelicias"

example: "Hi. My name is Jane Smith. I'm calling from Internet Company. My number is 800-555-1289. I was referred to you by Another Company because we provide VOIP services. Please give me a call and we can discuss our options. My name again is Jane Smith and I can be reached at 800-555-1289."

See. Not so hard is it?

Thank you, and have a nice day.

Food snobbery and other delights...

There are times when it would be nice to be a little less snobbish about food. Oh, well, snobbish is not the right word. I'll eat just about anything (except tomatoes, raw onions, anything made with aspartame, MSG [food allergies, small, but unpleasant], high fructose corn syrup [why? just why does this even need to exist?] or hot pineapple [just. ick]), but I have very exacting standards. Pretty much everything is better when made from scratch, and most of the time, it isn't that much more difficult than the same thing made from a box. I do make certain exceptions (I'm not making croissants from scratch whenever I feel the yen for one), but in general, fresh is best.

The point to this whole meander, and there is one, I promise, is that I can rarely just enjoy a meal cooked for me by someone else. I'm always critiquing. Especially dessert, because I make excellent dessert. Which sounds like bragging, but isn't because it's true.

There are two rules for making dessert for a crowd.

Rule One: Never try out a new recipe. Unless it is something simple and fairly foolproof (like mini chocolate lava cakes, which have about five ingredients and even if you overcook them slightly they will still be delicious even if no longer liquid in the center). New recipes are for nights with no guests. Or just family.

Rule Two, part 1: Don't apologize. Most people won't notice if you messed up, and even if they do, they won't say anything. Smile and accept the compliments with a charming smile and a demure thank you.

Rule Two, part 2: Don't compliment yourself. It's not becoming.

All of which leads to this: Start with less salt than the recipe calls for. It's easy to add more, and not so easy to take it out. Also, cheesecake is always a good choice. Especially when combined with brownies... I'm just saying.

Word of the day: Crepes

Rehearsal, rehearsal, rehearsal...

Rehearsals for the 2006 season of the Central Coast Shakespeare Festival have officially begun! I find that as much as I love the rehearsal process (and you have to love it to do theater, especially local theater, since more time is usually spent rehearsing than performing), I love my nights off equally. One doesn't appreciate a free evening until most of them are claimed by something. My favorites are the unexpected nights off. Like tonight, for example, we were supposed to have a second read through of Macbeth, but the director decided that we did such a lovely job of it last night, that she didn't need to hear it again tonight. This means my next rehearsal isn't until Sunday evening. At which time we will be doing preliminary blocking on the ballroom scene for The Three Musketeers, I believe. We might be doing something else, but I think I have it right.

I love theater. How else could I get foully murdered and almost have an affair alternately? Well, I suppose I could do those things in real life, but I could only do one of them once, and I don't think it would be too much fun. I'll do my best to stick with being murdered (almost) on stage. And, since I'm not the type to give a man twelve diamonds as a token of my affection, I'll save that for the stage too.

Endearment for the week: Sweet Pea (it works equally well on men, children, dogs, cats and horses, that sort of broad appeal doesn't happen too often)

Soon, I will go back to cleaning up and moving around. This weekend might be the last weekend for Tropicana Nursery. One part of me is very sad. Another part of me is ready for it to be over and done with. Especially the stupid people asking annoying questions part of it. Who knew that a closing sign would bring the morons out of the woodwork. I was pretty sure we would see people who had never shopped at the nursery before, but I didn't realize how many vultures would descend, or how rude they would be. I don't know why people think they are allowed to be insulting during a clearance sale. Sure, stuff is looking ratty, but that's because what's left is all the oldest stuff, the nice things went first, but saying how bad everything loooks is not going to get you a better deal. At least, not in my store.

Harley's rules for bargain hunters:

1.) I don't mind bargaining (I used to mind, but I've gotten better), but be polite, it'll get you a better deal. And, I won't make faces at you behind your back.

2.) Don't tell lies that I can easily see through. I've worked in the store for 10 years, I know who our regular customers are. I might not recognize you if you only come in a couple times a year, but come in more than three times in a two month period, and I will remember you for awhile (I can't promise forever, because information gets pushed out to make room for new stuff).

3.) Start with a compliment. It doesn't have to be much. "You have such interesting plants." "It's fun to look around." You know the sort of thing. It puts me in a more receptive mood to you asking for a better deal.

I'll post more when I think of some. If I think of some. Three might be enough. Especially since one and three are much the same. :-)

Talk on ya later,

Harley